Gratitude Is a Slippery Skill … or Not

Guest Blog

By Dr. Kirk Mahoney

Gratitude is a slippery skill … or not. Here are five reasons for this dichotomy.

1. Gratitude is reciprocal … or not. People who are targets of gratitude often reciprocate, but gratitude is not necessarily reciprocal. For example, you may thank a client and not get any thanks in return. Remember, though, that gratitude often will be reciprocated eventually, just not necessarily from the original target of your gratitude.

2. Gratitude comes naturally … or not. Some people seem to have a natural skill for expressing gratitude, but it does not come naturally for most of us. Look at most children; they can be some of the most narcissistic and least grateful people on the planet. Only with constant reinforcement do they become good at expressing gratitude.

3. Gratitude is simple … or not. An expression of gratitude can be as simple as a smile. Sometimes gratitude is expressed in complex ways — such as words of congratulations mixed with admitting that one was nervous about a teammate's performance. When you become skilled with gratitude, though, you will become good at keeping it simple and immediate.

4. Gratitude should be public … or not. Many of us know the advice, "Criticize in private; praise in public." But some people can be so introverted that public praise can make them feel uncomfortable. You can always express your gratitude in private with the person for whom you are grateful … or just put your expression in writing.

5. Gratitude is finite … or not. At first blush, gratitude seems to be finite. After all, things do NOT always turn out well. On top of this, we can easily miss opportunities to express our gratefulness. When you practice the skill of gratitude daily, you discover that the triggers for gratitude are infinite and that the ways in which you can express gratitude are limited only by your imagination.

How can we embrace this slippery skill called gratitude? Sports performance pioneer Stacey Vornbrock, M.S., (ByeByeBlocks.com) recently taught me that athletes improve the fastest and most effortlessly by letting go, allowing, and trusting. We can apply this to gratitude.

  • We can let go of expecting our expressions of gratitude to be immediately and obviously reciprocated.
  • We can allow inspiration to tell us where, how, when, and in what way to express or feel gratitude.
  • We can trust that gratitude comes back to us many fold.

Gratitude is a skill that can and should be mastered — with daily practice. Ultimately, gratitude is a four-letter word: L-O-V-E. No matter what your endeavor is — be it running a business or just plain running — loving what you do and the people, places, and things that support you is how you thrive.

About my guest blogger: Dr. Kirk Mahoney is the author of three books, including Mental Tricks for Endurance Runners and Walkers, 123 Cellphone Tips for Runners and Walkers, and his just-released Gratitude Power for Runners and Walkers. Kirk's mission is to help you to kindle happiness in your endurance running or walking while you enjoy growth and better health from the sport. You can follow Kirk at SpryFeet.com, Facebook.com/SpryFeet, and Twitter.com/SpryFeet.

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